...Mother Teresa said that. I've been thinking in my own practice what this means to me specifically and on THIS day, it means setting aside "my position" and loving enough to set my pain aside so that I can bring forth the compassion for someone else's.

On Monday, I was gifted with perhaps a once in a lifetime opportunity to experience a private blessing with and BY an actual Tibetan Buddhist monk. The entire ritualistic blessing lasted about 30 minutes where I was chanted over, cleansed in body, speech, and mind, in the physical and subtle body and asked to exhale any negativities I carried in any area of my being into clay for it to be washed away as blessed water poured off of my head and into nothingness. Words cannot explain the experience but I studied this Lama's face deeply; I wanted to remember him in my heart as he meditated on mine and my wellbeing all in the name of Vajravidarin, a Tantric healing ritual. In the end I was given blessed seeds and a wearable offering that His Holiness himself, the Dali Lama blessed. It was a very precious experience...

I am preparing for a few local benefits that I am a part of, the first happening very soon, May 20. It's going to be a collective of local teachers getting together and rocking the house in the name of the Cambodian Children's Fund. I will be getting the Chanting and guitar portion on and I just know this event is going to be such a blast and a union of amazing energies! Lululemon is a sponsor and my sweet girlfriends over there have such a big part in bringing us all together.... big BIG love and hugs to you ladies! I am so proud to work with and know you all! :x

The details of this event:
CHANGING THE WORLD, ONE OM AT A TIME
In support of "OFF THE MAT, INTO THE WORLD" and the CAMBODIAN'S CHILDREN'S FUND

Tuesday May 20 730-930 pm FULL MOON CELEBRATION
at Mercury Hall (615 Cardinal Ln. Austin 78704)

Suggested Donation is $25.00 and we are pre-selling tickets! Talk to me if you would like one!

LoveLoveLove,
Sanieh

This image is from early afternoon Yesterday, where my Sunday included yoga and sun and ended with somewhat of a freak motorcycle accident (almost posted that photo but thought I'd spare you for now) that has me asking myself where the lesson is in all of this.

My teacher reminds me often to find the guru in all forms, in all things. I am looking down at my bandaged leg that sometimes allows just about 50 percent of weight on the side of trauma: and while my mind is healthy, I'm finding difficulty in all of this at the moment.

I KNOW that everything will be fine but as a yogi friend of mine once shared with me; right now, it's not.

While in this moment I am experiencing difficulty, I am present enough to recognize that there is in a fact something deeper here that I need to see... I'm still working that out though. I also recognize that its in this moment  where opportunity rests; that I can bring forth the grace of a woman and practitioner of yoga and step up and REALLY be a teacher to those around me.

I find no irony in that tomorrow night (Tuesday), I will be attending the "Changing the World One OM at a Time" event for the Cambodian's Children's Fund where I have been blessed and given the honor to share Bhakti, the Yoga of Devotion, with all who will graciously donate their time and money to this cause where there is real trauma and tragedy.

So it's 830 pm and while I write this with a heavy heart, it is with the belief that collectively, in a few areas, the calling of my life is here to be the guru that my own teacher speaks so fondly of... the time is now that I sit and be with the underlying current as I breathe, meditate and listen to that guru.

With Bhakti,
Sanieh
www.saniehyoga.com

Late last night I received a text from a friend that said the following:

"It appears that the notion of body, mind, and soul existing holistically as "one" is being well represented in this experience for you".

My friend was right on when he mentioned that the spiritual, emotional, and psychological affect this experience is having on me is an obvious one and that has got me thinking deeply. I was challenged during my first class this morning, as in this representation, because I felt off...furthermore I was having difficulty in digesting the idea that my transmission was as such. Funny, sometimes teachers can carry a lot of guilt over this kind of thing...  Initially this experience was a physical body thing...

I went in to teach my second class tonight where I found myself in the bathroom changing the dressings of my wound and behind the tears I searched for understanding of what had me so shaken and upset. afterall, Physically, I'm pretty well off although there are some limitations. I "pondered" back to what my friend said about about the body, mind, and soul existing as one and I began to soften into what I was feeling; finding more "sense" in feeling so off kilter. ahh ha moment...

Sometimes a good cry makes all the difference.

At the top of my next class, I paused and shared an experience I had with a teacher once who went into very personal details of his life experience at the start of a workshop, with hopes that we would understand the space from which he would navigate the weekend. I tried to honestly convey to this class that our practice isn't always about the body and if it is, that too will change... if not by conscious choice, then sadly, one day, by force. Be it injury, or death.

Which brings me to impermanence...

One of the most amazing and memorable documentaries I have ever watched was "Fierce Grace" by Ram Dass. Throughout the entire film Ram Dass says "I've been stroked" in reference to the grace he had been given. The name of the documentary rings strongly in my ear at the moment  because in less than 48 hours, after an accident that has shaken me to my core far deeper than any damages or possible scarring that might be left of my physical body; all that  I  can sit with is the reminder that it's all impermanent and that having grace throughout this life is the strength of what my practice is becoming- being one with the SHAKTI... perhaps by force of this event, or perhaps by  the GRACE of.

In my confusion beneath the search for understanding the message and lesson, I sit within myself a little softer, feeling more feminine, and yes, with much more grace than I embodied even Sunday morning. Although I really don't know if any of this is making sense to any reader out there or if I'm connecting anyone on that spiritual level, there is a shift unfolding and perhaps THAT was the intent for me to take from this experience.

My /our practice is not my/our  body, my being a teacher even, is not this body. The strength of my love is not this body and my soul is not this body. So now I move into the advanced practice that is defining grace and teaching it ...through becoming it.

"Impatient with grace, we pray faster" -by Steven Levine
(excerpt)
Some see grace as their destination, other as their process. Both however often share the trap of wanting to "go faster than grace".

Born into a life in which we own nothing, yet love none-the-less, we become attached to so much then decompose when what we never owned departs.

Though we may be hard in sorrow, unable to discern our face in the mirror, pained as we may be, that does not alter the fact that behind who we think we see
Grace is our original face.

With lovelovelove and Bhakti; devotion to that love...
Sanieh
www.saniehyoga.com

Sometimes forgetting about yourself and moving into the truth that there are children living in dumpsters in different parts of our world, is what one needs to find lightness or clarity in our own dilemmas.

Last night's fundraiser for the Cambodian's Children's Fund had us all beside ourselves with the turnout and how much energy was shared at the beautiful Mercury Hall. Although I do not know the numbers at this time,  I am so So grateful to have been able to be a part of it  in the making and am so grateful to my fellow yogis/yoginis who came together in the name of all things outside of ourselves.

This event came together out of a need, turned vision, turned event... and in a short amount of time and had us opening doors so that people could throw down mats outside to participate. Mat's were touching and although there was little room for assistants to navigate the room- the event was successful and powerful... I hope someone will share with me a photo so that I can post :)

Pranams,
Sanieh
www.saniehyoga.com